I am more vain about fake moustaches than I ever have been about makeup, and at times of great distress I find myself conversing with puddles, I despise empty plug sockets with the smug little switch turned on powering nothing, it needs to be turned off immediately... and why do biscuits only have chocolate on one side and why are rapper's love interests always short or "shawt" and why can't I stop listening to Toots & Maytals, I'll tell you why, their gargling happiness like crunching stones in a driveway makes me realise that is why people were given voices. Life is something which I don't understand, I don't understand myself or why I am how I am. Other people are far more confusing though, and let's leave it at that.
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